Thursday, July 3, 2014

where are you

Woke up in the dream, but felt like reality. It was so bright in the room. It was more like I suddenly appeared in a shop window. But no, only it was ground floor, and the big windows looked straight on the street. Think someone even looked in while passing by. And I couldn't get it what I was doing there. All alone. It didn't make sense.
So I was upstairs, and feeling safer, in a more private place with curtains. But still looking for someone. You. I understood that when I opened the window, and saw you outside. On a narrow ledge. It was disturbing. Though I don't remember being afraid that you might wanted to jump. More like you were coming inside. Then saw you leaned down to pick up something.
From the balcony. For that's what it was by then. I turned to see who was talking behind me. Some friendly neighbors passing time on their own balcony in the fine weather. We said hello. I think they had a little dog, or two.
When we were inside I had to look at you closely. I was touching your face as if I was blind, and had to feel that it was you. To make sure. You looked so much like yourself, and yet somehow different. The dream was so real, and I couldn't comprehend how it was possible. You being yourself, and yet as if only resembling a picture of you. You didn't understand, and kind of smiled.
Out again, but this time downstairs, in a garden. I think I still sensed you around. Maybe I wanted to show you something. I already moved away from the terrace, and was out between the trees and plants. I believe I heard a dog from somewhere. Suddenly, when I turned, it was dark with the vague outside lights on. And it was snowing. Actually all was covered in snow. As a contrast to the surrounding darkness. I woke up then in reality. And you were gone.