Thank God, it's overdue!

Could it be that questioning things which wouldn't make you feel that life makes sense is actually about you realizing that you're missing love in your life? Yes, it could. It's about all the useless facts like dinosaurs which couldn't make you happy anyhow or help a tiny little bit when you're craving certainty, and want to feel that it's not only a small life so manic, but something more and longer lasting (even longer than the dinosaurs, that is).

punch a higher floor

Some nights ago I had these wild dreams... again, of me traveling in a strangely disfunctioning elevator... or for all I know (after having watched the HHGTTG again) it was working alright. Anyhow it was taking me apparently too high, and too fast, and back and forth and sideways. In other words it was out of control, as you would say it under normal circumstances. And even my Modern Book on Dreams said it was all about sexuality. I wonder if Prince talks about it in that song of his. It wouldn't be so very unlikely of him to do so, but... even Let's Go Crazy sounds to be about life. So if I take his advice and take a look around, I do have to admit - my dream was definitely about life. And it looks a lot like it can go out of control even more... which doesn't mean much good. But then again what's good, what's bad, and of course, at least you got friends.

momentarily

life should be at its best
so let just rest the rest
it's always now and here
else you'll give in to fear

true love

when love grows deep enough
even if shattered it works in the depths
washing away all that's useless
and using it for that which matters

A.I.

it's frightening to see that we can only scream
even in business to customers we need
just like small children or drunkards in the streets
as if we expect the softwares that we feed
to communicate for us just to pay a fee
so we feel that we stay behind technology
but how could it be us; there's no such trickery

condition of the heart

it's a delicate thing, the heart
you can't buy it by the pound
it might just fail you
when you feel you

can't take it anymore
when you'd give up 'cause it hurts to have a soul
only you need to realize
no-one but you'll take care of that what's yours

i wish my heart would crack so big
that the whole wide world would fit in it
then nothing would hurt anymore
'cause i couldn't ask for nothing more

Can you fight your nightmares?

It might have happened because I'm reading the Sandman series again, and last night I got to that part where the one who thought himself to be the true Sandman tried to fight the real one. Anyhow, in my dream I was left on my own by my otherwise kind hosts in the TV room and the lights went off... and as far as I can remember there was either something rather fearful appearing on the screen when I realized I was alone, or it was in my mind which is basically all the same under the circumstances. What was a relief even while I was still going on dreaming, was that I could hover upwards (no, I don't remember flying but it's an unmistakable clue). Then as if arriving from some kind of floating over the house - or what seemed to be an overview like a 3D plan of it - I found myself in the top room. Maybe it was not even a room, but the top of a bunk bed. Looking down from there it felt so safe and easy to see the big picture. I guess that says it all about how I feel.

essential

we're all in that bowl
we're blood, piss and heart
all of us on the inside
no matter how we look like

and there's a mistery
that's not in that bowl
it's not in the parts
it's in each and every heart

I wish

I wish I was writer who sees what's yet unseen
whenever I can feel my patience wearing thin
I wish I had a heartbeat that never comes to rest
suppose that all we have would turn out for the best
I shed my tears so horrified by people's indifference
who ignored a blood-covered man standing amongst them
I still cannot help the immigrants in the streets of your city
unless your love will overcome your fear of responsibility

the winter of our discontent

when we can't rejoice as the long awaited snow arrives
and our love is but a complete stranger
then our hearts turn frozen to make us act cold as ice
and our words get lost in this aged world

nature girl

I met a girl who traveled all over the world
she even wrote a book about all of that
the journey of a soul,
A genuine smile
with magic power
and full of life
she wore

Then years later my path crossed again with hers
her hair turned from ghastly orange to silver gray
but her smile remained,
For she stayed young
both to the eye
and deep inside
in her very heart

maybe it's 'cause we're all gonna die

a friend couldn't understand my fascination with the occult
another one asked if I was not scared to watch horror movies
my answer to both of them was that it could have been the result
of me trying to escape from the terrors of reality

i had so many nightmares, a lot of frightening visions, did i
yet none was as dreadful as the sheer thought that occurred to me
one night when i woke up as a teenager and knew that i would die
and there was nothing in this world that i could do about it

developing

is it developing to find a new life
while still running after the old one
and to meet someone on the route at night
just to say goodbye to your old love

you are developing a life that you've missed
because you just didn't see the chance
so you know it was the last time you kissed
while exchanging a final glance

changelings

They stand motionless like changelings in a cricket field,
I find it difficult to walk between them without fear.
Not only their clothes are dark but their minds and their mood,
and even when they move they seem to be made of wood.
Any colors in appearance or in behavior they might take as offence,
and a whole party of them claims this to be their protence...

habitual ritual

it was a strange night this last night
i saw someone online whom i loved
but we might not talk again now

it was a busy day yesterday
calls repeating themselves like the dreams
that came back about folks i've never seen

and about the tiny lavender bloom
that fell off the bunch where it belonged to
a feeling that we might share with you
when one stays oneself out of the two